Saturday, January 12, 2008

º Blame on failed students?

It's not the fault of the student if he fails, because the year ONLY has 365' days.
Boring Lecture

Typical academic year for a student:
1. Sundays - 52 in a year, you know Sundays are for rest.
TV
Days left 313.

2. Summer holidays - 50 where weather is very hot and difficult to study.
Melting
Days left 263.

3. 8 hours daily sleep - 130 days GONE..
Sleepy
Days left 141.

4. 1 hour for daily playing - (good for health) means 15 days.
Swinging 2
Days left 126.

5. 2 hours daily for food & other delicacies (chewing properly & swallowing) -means 30days.
Munchy
Days left 96.

6. 1 hour for talking (man is a social animal)-means 15 days.
Gossip
Days left 81.

7. Exam days - per year at least 35 days.
Cheater
Days left 46.

8. Quarterly, Half yearly and festival (holidays) -40 days.
Presents
Balance 6 days.

9. For sickness - at least 3 days.
Sneezy
Remaining days=3.

10. Movies and functions - at least 2 days.
Movie Theater
1 day left.

11. That 1 day is your birthday. How can you study on that day??????!!!!!!!!!!
Make A Wish
Balance = 0

How can a student pass ?????

Teacher Teacher 2

º Way to spot a Myanmar

Myanmar (formerly and widely known as Burma & Burmese)

You know that you are definitely a Burmese if: -
1. Everything you eat is savored in garlic, onion and chilies.
2. You try and re-use gift wrappers, gift boxes, and of course aluminum foil.
3. You try to eject food particles from between your teeth by pressing your tongue against them and making a peculiar noise like, tshick, tshick!
4. You are standing next to the two largest size suitcases at the Airport.
5. You arrive one or two hours late to a party, and think it's normal.
6. You peel the stamps off letters that the Postal Service missed to stamp.
7. Your toilet has a plastic bowl next to the commode.
8. You name your children in rhythms (example, Myat Noe & Myat Moe, Mar Lar & Thar Yar )
9. All your children have pet names, which sound no where close to their real names.
10. You take Burmese snacks anywhere it says "No Food Allowed".
11. You talk for an hour at the front door when leaving someone's house.
12. You load up the family car with as many people as possible.
13. You use plastic to cover anything new in your house whether it's the remote control, VCR, carpet or new couch.
14. Your parents tell you to not care about what your friends think, but they won't let you do certain things because of what the other "Uncles And Aunties" will think.
15. Owning a rice cooker is a top priority.
16. You live with your parents even if you are 40 years old and married with children. (And they like it that way).

17. If she is NOT your daughter, you always take interest in knowing whose daughter has run away with whose son and feel its your duty to spread the word.
18. You don't make long distance calls even in an emergeny.

19. If you don't live at home, when your parents call, they ask if you've eaten, even if it's midnight.
20. When your parents meet other Burmese for the first time and talk for a few minutes, you soon discover they are your relatives.
21. Your parents don't realize phone connections to foreign countries have improved in the last two decades, and still scream at the top of their lungs while talking.
22. You have bed sheets on your sofas so as to keep them from getting dirty but the sheet on your bed has not been washed for months!
23. It's embarrassing if your wedding has less than 600 people.
24. You list your daughter as "fair and slim" in the matrimonial no matter what she looks like. 25. You're always interested to know/interfere in other peoples personal matters, what they are doing, where they are going, etc.
26. You have really enjoyed reading this mail because you know some, or most of them apply to you!

Monday, January 7, 2008

º Power of Punctuation

An English professor wrote the words:
"A woman without her man is nothing"

on the chalkboard and asked his students to punctuate it correctly.

All of the males in the class wrote:
"A woman, without her man, is nothing."

All the females in the class wrote:
"A woman: without her, man is nothing."

Be great at punctuation!!