º Chewing Gum Story

One day, Lee Kuan Yu (former Prime mister) went to Thailand and had lobster at the dinner with the Thai King. After Lee finished, he ask the King.
Lee: Your highness, what can you do with this lobster skin???
King; We can't do anything with it, we just throw away.
Lee : Oh! No! ... In our country, we send it to the factory and produce some prawn cracker.

Then, Lee had an orange. After he finished, he asked the King.
Lee : What can you do with the orange skin?
King: We can't do anything. We just throw away.
Lee : Oh! No!! In singapore, we sent it to the factory and produce some orange jam.

Then Lee asked for chewing gum. After he finished, he put on the plate and ask the King.
Lee : What can you do with the chewing gum??
King: Oh, no we just throw away.
Lee : In singapore, we send it to the factory and produce condoms send it to Thailand.

Lee said "Good Bye.." to the King and the King asked Lee.
King: What can you do with the condom when you finish using it?
Lee : We can't do anything. We throw it away.
King ; Oh, No... In Thailand, when we finish using the condom, we send it to the factory to produce chewing gum and send it back to Singapore!!!!

º Marriage Humour

1. Women are unpredictable. Before marriage, she expects a man, after marriage she suspects him, and after death she respects him.

2. There was this guy who told his woman that he loved her so much that he would go thru hell for her. They got married - and now he is going thru hell.

3. A man inserted an 'ad' in the classifieds : "Wife wanted ". Next day, he received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing : "You can have mine."

4. When a man opens the door of his car for his wife, you can be sure of one thing: either the car is new or the wife.

5. It's easy to tell if a man is married or not. Just watch him drive a car with a woman sitting beside him. If both his hands are on the wheel, you can be sure he is married.

6. A man received a letter from some kidnappers. The letter said, "If you don't promise to send us $100,000 I swear that we will kidnap your wife." The poor man wrote back, "I am afraid I can't keep my promise but I hope you will keep yours."

7. What's the matter, you look depressed." "I'm having trouble with my wife." "What happened?" "She said she wasn't going to speak to me for 30 days." "But that ought to make you happy." "It did, but today is the last day."

WOMAN
When she is 18 - She is a football, 22 men going after her.
When she is 28 - She is a hockey ball, 8 men going after her.
When she is 38 - She is a golf ball, 1 man hitting on her.
When she is 48 - She is a pingpong ball, 2 men pushing to each other.

MAN
At 20 - A man is like a coconut, so much to offer, so little to give.
At 30 - He is like a durian, dangerous but delicious.
At 40 - He is like a watermelon, big, round and juicy.
At 50 - He is like a mandarin orange, the season comes once in a year.
At 60 - He is just like a raisin, dried out, wrinkles and cheap.

º Let's play with Your Truth!

GET A PIECE OF PAPER AND NUMBER IT 1-9.
(NO CHEATING)

1. WHAT SHADE OF HAIR DO YOU HAVE?:
a. DARK
b. LIGHT

2. IF YOU WERE OUT ON A DATE WOULD YOU WANT TO:
a. GO TO A PARTY
b. GO OUT TO EAT

3. WHATS YOUR FAVORITE COLOR OUT OF:
a. PINK
b. YELLOW
c. BABY-BLUE
d. SEA-FOAMGREEN

4. PICK YOUR FAVORITE HOBBIE OUT OF:
a. SURFING
b. SKATING
c. SKIING

5. IF YOU COULD PICK A STORE BETWEEN THESE WHICH WOULD YOU PICK?:
a. OLD NAVY
b. PACIFIC SUNWEAR
c. VICTORIA'S SECRET

6. WHATS YOUR FAVORITE STATE OUT OF:
a. CALIFORNIA
b. FLORIDA
c. OHIO

7. IN THE SUMMER WOULD YOU RATHER GO TO:
a. THE BEACH
b. GO SOMEWHERE COOLER

8. WHATS YOUR BIRTHDAY MONTH?
a. January
b. Febuary
c. March
d. April
e. May
f. June
g. July
h. August
i. September
j. October
k. November
l. December

9. WOULD YOU RATHER:
a. CHILL AT HOME
b. GO OUT WITH FRIENDS

***********
*********************
************
**********************
*************
******************
****************
**************
**********
***********
****
***********
********
*****
*********
********
***********
************
**************
****************
**************
*********************
*************
**********************
***************
******************
****************
**************
************
**********
**********
****
********
*******
*******

*ANSWERS*
1. a- dark: sexy
b- light: sweet

2. a- go to a party: playful
b- go out to eat: romantic

3. a- pink: cute
b- yellow: loud
c- baby-blue: cool
d- sea-green: horny

4. a- surfing: active
b- skating: determined
c- sking: daring

5. a- old navy: preppy
b- pacific sunwear: fun
c- victoria's secret: sexy

6. a- California: you like being around people
b- Florida: party time in the Heat
c- Ohio: quiet, likes the cold

7. a- beach: tan likes the sun
b- somewhere cooler: pale and original

8. a- January: popular
b- February: lovely
c- March: loud
d- April: playful
e- May: chills a lot
f- June: happy
g- July: smooth
h- August: fun
i- September: quiet
j- October: out going
k- November: pimpin it
l- December: warm

9. a- Home: boring
b- Go out with friends: crazy